A Religious Experience

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Oct 12, 2019 22:36
I didn’t get any religious education during my boyhood. In fact, I got antireligious education at school. However, I was baptized and my mother carried the cheap small cross in the little box together with the small piece oilcloth (with her name, my weight and tall) which an obstetrician tied to my leg when I was born. To wear a cross at school was banished. My mother cooked Ester cakes on the Esters, but she also didn’t get any religious education. When I once I exclaimed, complaining on hardship of my child life, “Lord!”, my brothers and parents laughed at me, “What? What did you say! Aha-ha-ha! Where have you heard it? Did you imitate after somebody?”
Once, I was walking home after school. I was nine or ten years old. I was walking with my girlfriend. I was fallen in love (my love was expressed in carrying her bag). We were walking past the church (we stopped to a church we passed along the way…). Suddenly my girlfriend said, “I want to enter the church. ”What a strange wish! We didn’t have to go in church. She went into the church and I stayed in front of the gate seeing through the opened doors as candles were flickering in the semidarkness from outside. After some time she went out. She was walking upright. Her protruding ears was red. Her face was spiritual. I asked, “What is there?”. She said, “I’ll go inside again.” And she turned around and headed into the church when I was waiting indecisively. (When I reflex about my life, I often think that I’m always too indecisive. I have to be more active instead being reflexing)
Many a year later I entered that church. I went to that church till I left my native town for another. When I went to the church, I always light a candle before an icon the subject of which I liked – Jesus Heals the Man Born Blind. I do believe; help my unbelief! (it’s from another verse, I know)