(4) My Life: First Half NYC, Latter Half Paris

Frenchmen know better how to have fun better than Americans.

Every June, There was a Paris music festival takes place in Paris every June, when with hundreds of open-air concerts were held at the same time simultaneously at different places locations in this city.

Sounds much more native like this.

The subway was so crowded that its charging system was suspended.

On “La Nuit Blanche” (White Night) every October, those shops which closed early on ordinary nights operated through the whole/entire night till 7 AM the next day.

It possessed all what sea beaches had – soft sand, hammocks, sun loungers, palm trees, etc., which enabling those who couldn’t afford to travel to the sea to enjoy the beach-like scenery.

Working hard to write during the daytime, but at night, I think I’ll set turn my phone off.”

The sun would also rise.

COMMENT: This is certainly one of many possible wordings. If you someday want to make this a short story, a more catchy title will be needed. However, the wording above is also a valid choice.

COMMENT: Your wording is fine by traditional grammar. In American English today, the past perfect is often replaced by the simple past . . . my prediction is that the past perfect will gradually disappear from English within a hundred years.

PUNCTUATION: Change the 句点 "。" to a Latin full stop (Am. Eng.: period).

QUESTION: When writing Chinese should I use the "。" or the "."? I know Japanese uses the
former. And maybe Taiwanese do too. What about in mainland China?

Point #1: The comma is optional. For such a short sentence, I think it is unneeded. Point #2: If you are *in* Paris, then "this city" sounds natural. However, if you are far away from Europe, then "that city" sounds better.

LOGIC: Since this is still true, perhaps the *present tense* is better. Psychologically, the present tense feels more lively and engaging than the past tense. That is why great fiction writers often use the present tense often, to create the myth of a sort of "living bubble" about events which - strictly speaking - have already occured. Frenchmen know better to have fun than Americans.

One more option: French people know to have better fun than Americans. [This wording is non-sexist. Why limit the discussion to *men* only? Often, the best fun is when people of many genders are celebrating.]

NOTE: Actually, there are *many* music festivals in June in Paris. Give readers more details! What genre of music are we talking about? Jazz? Classical? Heavy metal? It would be be best to specify the gender, and maybe even mention the location. To give this writing flavour, throw in some French words: bring readers in the event.

(I could not understand the meaning of this sentence.)

On “La Nuit Blanche” (White Night) every October, those shops which usually close at 7:00 PM on ordinary nights operated through the whole night till 7 AM the next day.

Every summer, the Paris Council creates a 1.8-kilometer artificial beach along the right bank of the Seine.

During that time soft sand, hammocks, sun loungers, and palm trees spring up, which enabling those who can't afford to travel to the distant seacoast to enjoy (the) beach-like scenery.

OBSERVATION: Culturally, I am baffled by this sentence - even though I understand the lexical items. My first thought was, "Is any culture more 'profound' that any other culture?" To me, it seems each culture has its profundity and its frivolity - and these two notions are not necessarily antithetical. Beer and skittles? It seems "Skittles" is a trademarked name by a British confectionary company. Hence, technically it would be capitalised.

CONFESSION: I have never eaten any Skittles in my life. This is the first time to learn of that word. Perhaps I have been in Asia too long!

SUGGESTION: It might be best to use a non-sexist wording. "French people" is a better word choice than "Frenchmen." Of course, you are attempting a generalisation that reinforces stereotypes that might not be accurate. Why not mention some objective data about reading habits?

Here are some reputedly objective sources of information about reading habits in the USA and France: (1) http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/10/19/slightly-fewer-americans-are-reading-print-books-new-survey-finds/ft_15-10-09_books_averageread/ (2) http://www.humaniteinenglish.com/spip.php?article2452

SUGGESTION: Check the wording - "reading festival" is possible, but "book festival" is a more common word choice. Ideally, mention the French word for this festival and add the [English name] in brackets - that will give readers a better flavour of the language and culture.

SUGGESTION: Since you are describing an ongoing custom, the *present tense* makes sense - Bookstores operated till the dawn, and hosted live concerts the whole night.

My preference: Bookstores operate till dawn, hosting live concerts the whole night.

SUGGESTION: Actually, the narrative flows more smoothly without the final four words. Some people might content that banks are are money-oriented as stock exchanges . . . A short, clean narrative is more eloquent - Cookbook exhibitions are held at stock exchanges - the most money-oriented site.

LOGIC: Since this article is about *Paris* the next sentence does not seem to fit, unless you are referring to to small local book fairs within Paris. At small-town book fairs, people climbed to pick the books off the trees like fruits before they can enjoy reading them.

A smoother wording - At some local book fairs in Paris, people climb to pick books off the trees like fruits before they can even enjoy reading them.

A French friend came to pick me up when I arrived in Paris in a November.

SUGGESTION: The word "ask" was used two sentences before. Therefore, using a different word would give this sentence a better flavour. “And then?” I enquired/inquired.

For me, going to a bank may be just a trifle after a lunchtime, but for many French citizens, it is a whole day's task.

SUGGESTION: At this point in history, it is wise to avoid the word "Frenchmen" and use a more gender-neutral expression such as "French person" or "French citizen."Unhurriedly and intently, most French people try to ensure that their petty affairs go well.

This way of thinking, however, might be deemed effete by most Americans and Taiwanese people.

COMMENT: Your grammar is fine. However, the narrative would be more interesting if you mention *how long* you were in Paris. Here is a suggested revision - When I returned to Taipei after a **-day visit to Paris, Taiwan's biggest city seemed unchanged.

It was from a persistent friend who called repeatedly until getting through.

I paused for a minute in perplexity, the whispered, "PLAN??"

COMMENT: It is not clear *who* is saying - or thinking - this, so I recommend this wording - Inside my head, I was thinking, “To live my life well.

COMMENT: The word "biggest" sounds very New Yorkish to me. Here is a slightly different wording - Isn’t that the only really sane plan?” The words were on the tip of my tongue, but I didn’t say them aloud, because I knew it might sound quite affected – I was now standing in a bustling street of Taipei, and I hadn’t turned 40 yet.

In addition, wasn’t my leisurely life in France partially thanks to the wealth I’d accumulated in NYC several years ago?

Your original wording is possible. More succinctly - In fact, I still loved to work.

NOTE: Since NYC was previously mentioned, a different wording is more eloquent - I loved the Big Apple.

I just didn’t have to blindly follow the crowd, or always afraid of being off the track, as I was in my twenties.

I’ll get up early every day, and work hard to write during the daytime, but I think I’ll set/turn my phone off at night.”

OBSERVATION: This is like a Zen koan because the question is laden with paradox. Without "my" can there be a "me"? And although many people think in terms of "my world", what if we did a mind shift and switched this around in a revolutionary way and say, "the world's creation - one of the 8 billion human "I-s"?

Frenchmen were better at having fun than Americans.

There was a Paris music festival every June, when hundreds of open-air concerts were held at the same time at different places in this city. At the music festival held in Paris every June, from the afternoon to night, hundreds of open-air concerts were held simultaneously at several different places.

The subway would become so crowded that its fare would be suspended.

The correct term for 费 here is "fare" because charging is a verb.

Since this happens every year BUT you're talking about the past, "would be/would become" is (in my opinion) the most appropriate tense. I don't know why....

On the“La Nuit Blanche” (White Night) of every October, the shops which usually closed regularly early (shifted to operating) operated through the whole night till 7 AM the next day.

Every summer, the Paris Council arranges a 1.8-kilometer man-made beach along the right bank of the Seine.

It possessed all that natural sea beaches had – soft sand, hammocks, sun loungers, palm trees, etc., which enabled those who couldn’t afford to travel to the sea to enjoy the beach-like scenery.

Of course, French culture being so profound (deep), wasn’t all beer and skittles.

Americans read (to pass/to study for) license exams, while Frenchmen read for creating romance.

In the reading festival (that took place) every October, citizens would take turns reciting poems from the (train station platforms of big cites).

Bookstores would operated till the dawn, hosting live concerts the whole night.

All these scenes touched me (deeply).

For me, going to (the) bank (is) just a trifle after a lunchtime, but for a Frenchman, it was the whole task of a day.

Unhurriedly and intently, Frenchmen try to ensure that every single petty affair goes well.

This lifestyle (approach), however, (is) effete to most Americans and Taiwanese people.

When I came back from Paris, Taipei remained unchanged.

I came back from Paris to discover that Taipei had remained unchanged.

“(Isn't to live life well the biggest plan?)

In addition, couldn't the leisurely French-style life I was living now be partially attributed to the wealth I’d accumulated in NYC several years ago?

I just didn’t have to blindly follow the crowd, always afraid to veer off the track, as I did in my twenties.

I’ll get up early every day, and work hard (writing) during the daytime, but I think I’ll set my phone off at night.”

But, what if my world lacked me, what was left?

但我少了我，还剩什么？