I lost many people whom I loved #1570

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Nov 12, 2016 05:00 fact feeling(s) thought(s) family friend(s)
On November 9th, my father’s side grandmother passed away because of heart disease. She was 64 years old and I was 11 years old at the time. I was very sad and couldn’t accept her death for a while. Before graduating from my university, all of my grandparents had passed away. I know their deaths could not be avoidable.

My cat also died about 12 years ago, I was really sad and then I decided not to have any pets any more. Since I didn’t want to feel such deep sadness again. I also had some good friends and some boyfriends, but eventually our relationships were ended for some reasons, and I was very sad.

I gradually came to think that I’d rather not having deep relationships with others if I had to feel such sadness. So, I’ve tried to avoid building up deep relationship and try to be being one of their acquaintances. However, I’ve wavered and felt like building up a good relationship with my friends again.