I should start writing my own journal before reading othe peoples'! In order to improve my own English writing skill, I shoud write something, little by little, even about minor incidents, right? I'll do so today.
In my last entry I wrote what a hard time I had to go through in the ensemble rehearsal I belong to. We rehearsed a new song for everybody last ime, but I happened to be the only alto member (each part consisting of three people), and since I had not practiced enough, expecting the other two to lead me, I became the target of the conductor's severe training. The soprano sitting next to me asked the person next to her to change seats, as if to say she could not stand my poor performance any longer, which terribly hurt me.
The accident happened about five weeks ago, and yesterday we met for the first time since then. Our ensemble is a small group consisting of about 15 members inside our larger chorus group of about 50, and the larger group rehearse in the daytime, while the smaller ensemble practice in the evening on the same day, since the conductor is the same person and wants to lead us both in one day.
Yesterday, one of the other two altos of the ensemble team left early before the larger group finished rehearsing. And I knew the other one was not there. Would I be alone again in the ensemble practice? I was determined that I'd never go there again should I be the only alto who could be there. As the larger group's rehearsal was going on, I was wondering if I should really take absence. Would it not mean that I was 'defeated' by such a minor incident if I were to be away? I had had cold for a week, and I still couldn't produce a good voice yesterday, so I thought of making it an excuse to retire. Before I could decide what to do, the large group's reheasal ended. When I looked up, I found the other alto member of the ensemble present there. She had come late, but I didn't know it, since she was sitting behind me. "Why don't you experience the hardship I had to go through last time by yourself?" I said to her jokingly. I'll let her sing in a loud voice in my place, so I'll just accompany her, I decided.
At the rehearsal the conductor tortured me only once about my wrong rhythm. Of course I had practiced this song again and again before coming to the rehearsal, so as no to embarrass myself again! But last night there were some things that attracted her attention more than me. A tenor person who had escaped the last rehearsal came back, and he had to practice harder to catch up. Also there was a new member in bass, so she had to take some more energy to check these people. I was nervous at the beginning, but as the lesson went by, I found myself singing in a loud voice as usual. The lesson was over all right.
The alto member who was with me said, "Everything was all right, eh?" It was. But what I had had to go through was nothing but a bully for sure. It became a good lesson as a teacher. I hope time will heal me from this mental wound soon.
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Every morning when I open the Lang-8, I correct the Japanese sentences from my friends with pleasure. This is really a lot of fun for me, but it certainly takes from me a lot of time and energy, and as a result, after checking a number of sentences, I find myself lacking in any more energy left to w